YPLAT's Most Hated Top 15!
1) Tractors.
These things should be banned from the roads and only allowed to fart along at their top speed of 20 mph from midnight until 6.00 am! Virtually every journey I make I am guaranteed to be stuck behind a tractor crawling along. I know farmers have to make a living, etc but it is bloody ridiculous the vast amount of these awful things on the road compared to 10 years ago. They are sodding everywhere.
2) Caravans/Camper Vans
Hated with a real passion here at YPLAT. Again they drive along doing about 40 mph without a care in the world. Can't see the point of these f____ing things. Go camping in a static caravan, a tent or go stay at a hotel!
3) Drivers that hog the middle lane on motorways.
These are the idiots that think because they are driving at 70 mph that they should be in the middle lane then reducing the motorway to 2 lanes. Police are allegedly having a crackdown on these cretins. Give them fines of £1000 and crush their crappy cars.
4) Drivers that drive at 50-60 mph in 30 mph zones.
We were driving at 30mph past a school this week and some uber tuss in a Chelsea tractor decided to overtake doing about 50mph. I beeped this idiot but it just carried on. These feckless cretins deserve 10 years hard labour for such wanton acts of reckless/careless driving.
5) Chelsea Tractors.
Or those owned by snooty people who have no plans to take them off road and just see them as a status symbol to say "look at me". They usually have amusing names like "Warrior", "Big Boy" or some other "look at me don't I look really hard & butch?". No, you just look sad.
6) Bull/Kangaroo Bars
Usually found on the hated Chelsea Tractors. These are presumably kept on to protect their precious vehicle should somebody hopefully reverse into it or more likely that they hit a kangaroo or bull crossing the road without their parents (the amount of orphaned roos I have seen in Cornwall is unbelievable). Don't worry if you hit a child in the road you are far more likely to kill them with these needless bars attached to your shitty 4x4.
7) Cars that park in cycle lanes and on pavements.
These lazy sods force people like cyclists who are getting fit, keeping pollution levels down. etc into the busy road. And pavement hoggers force people with pushchairs or in wheelchairs to take their chances in the road. This really is plain lazy and selfish parking.
8) People that drive Citroen Berlingos, Vauxhall Agillas, etc.
These are these new sort of Noddy mobiles that
MUST NOT EVER GO ABOVE 30 MPH even if they are on a motorway! They tend to be driven by the more senior members of the community but that is no excuse for driving like a snail that has just drunk 10 pints of home brew cider.
9) The lack of traffic wardens in certain areas of Cornwall.
Controversial one this but we, at YPLAT, think that these upstanding citizens are the front line of attack against people who end up on this site.
10) Perfectly able people taking up disabled spaces.
These scum are the worst of the worst. I was up at the local 99p Shop a few months ago and saw two car loads of perfectly able (well not in the brain dept) young chavs arrive and both use disabled bay spaces so they wouldn't have to walk an extra few yards. Makes our blood boil.
11) People using hand held mobiles whilst driving.
Just been to see the quack for my monthly MOT (more of which later) and spotted a tuss using a hand held mobile phone (a cell phone if you live in the USA) whilst driving. This has been banned in the UK since 2003 but there are still a minority of cretins out there who think they are above the law. It is bloody dangerous but these people don't give a flying f__k about other people's safety. They would rather have a needless conversation on last night's edition of TOWIE than worry about crashing their souped up Ford Escort and potentially killing some poor unfortunate road user or pedestrian.
How did I get on the quack's I hear you ask? Well, she asked did I have a Bucket List and advised me to spend all my savings fairly soon. So all set fair I reckon.
12) Cyclists that ride on pavements.
Yes, we have all seen these jerks using the pavement as their own private cycle path and sod anyone that happens to be walking. They are called "sidewalks" in the USA which should give these idiots an idea what they should be used for. I appreciate cycle lanes get blocked by cars, it is dangerous on the road but sod off and don't ride on the pavements! I was driving at St Erth (where there are excellent cycle lanes on the A30) and witnessed some sodding buckethead riding on the pavement.
13) Personalised Number Plates.
Yes, you know the ones that have to show off their "status" by spending £1000s on a plate such as "TW 8T" and then illegally running all the letters together to spell their stupid name. Or putting a black-headed screw strategically on the plate to make a 1 into an I. Another favourite trick is to make a 5 look like an S. Sorry, but these saddoes need to get out more.
14) Drivers who are unaware where their left/right indicators are.
You know the type, the ones that simply can't be arsed to signal when turning left or right. You could be waiting at a roundabout, you see a car approaching on your right (not indicating) so you assume it is going straight on but the feckwit then turns to their left without signalling. If they had bothered to indicate you could have pulled out but no these arseholes show no consideration for other road users.
Worst still are the ones that pull out without indicating on a dual carriageway or motorway! This is so lazy and potentially dangerous. It happened to me on the A30 once and it was lucky I had ABS on the car because there was no way I would have avoided hitting this dickhead otherwise.
15) SMART Cars
One of the smallest cars on the UK's roads but often driven people who shouldn't be allowed a driving licence. See post above, I think the drivers of these pedal cars think they are above the law because no one will notice them as so they are so small and weedy little shytemobiles.
